Saturday, April 22, 2017

When You Should Have Said No

Hi! Remember me? Yeah, I tend to let this poor blog take a back seat. Right now though, I feel like I just need to talk to y'all.

I am a little overwhelmed at the moment. Not only have I changed jobs in the last 2 months, I also kept a PRN job, joined a direct sales company, AND enrolled in college to get my masters. Add to that the regular family/home stuff, a kid in the state tennis play offs, and two in baseball 3 nights a week and I am stretched a little thin.

Ironically, I have more time in the afternoons than I did with my previous job. I just find myself coming home and taking a nap instead of doing school work or housework like I should. My house looks like I am losing a game of Jumanji (Remember that book? It has always been a favorite. Oh, and the original movie.) and when I think of paying someone to help with it, I feel like I am failing somehow.

I am realizing that somewhere along the line, I should have said no. My new job was exactly what we needed as a family and I needed for myself. I have amazing coworkers who make me laugh and have quickly become a second family. I feel like I am in the right place for me right now. My PRN job is another story though. I agreed to stay one weekend a month because the money was great. I couldn't see turning it down. Now on the other hand, I dread knowing I have to go. I love the people I work with there but I dislike the drive and the time it takes away from my family. I also should have only taken one class this semester. I haven't been in school in almost 14 years. This is a huge adjustment and the field is not one that I know. Business is a huge leap from healthcare.

I don't regret my direct sales business though. I work from my phone and on Facebook so it fits in with my day. Also, I get paid to use the products I love and even get great rewards for it. If you look in the side bar you can click on over and check Perfectly Posh out.

I should have said no. And while for the next couple of months I can't change my answer, it will be changing as soon as I can. I did this to myself. For some reason I just keep thinking I am Wonder Woman and I can do it all. I really hate to disappoint you guys, but I'm not. I keep thinking back to when I wrote this whole 31 day series about Balancing it All a few years ago and wondering why I don't listen to my own advice. Balls are going to drop when you get overwhelmed and you just have to pray that they aren't the important ones. So, if you see my in person or talk to me on a regular basis (or you are Mel) and I start talking about adding anything else onto my plate- slap some sense into me. (Figuratively not literally.)

*****I miss this blog. I'm sorry I keep letting it slide to the back burner. I promise I think about it and those who read it a lot.******

Sunday, February 26, 2017

You Are NOT a Bad Mom

I have this tendency to hide from my kids when I get overwhelmed. I don't think anything about it because I really need to walk away sometimes. (Hard lesson learned) So when a waitress at one of our favorite restaurants said she felt like a bad mom for locking herself in her bathroom to eat a bowl of cereal and have a few minutes to herself I told her to stop beating herself up.

You are not a bad mom if you hide from your kids every once in a while.

Stepping away to get a moment to yourself is necessary sometimes. I know all to well that if you don't take care of yourself, a nervous breakdown is a coming.

I am now a full believer in hiding, pampering, and making sure I take care of myself.

My kids are surviving just fine and your's will too. Hide, go to get your nails done, make sure you go to the doctor. You cannot take care of your family if you are running on empty.

And like I told the waitress, hiding every once in  while does not make you a bad mother.

Friday, January 6, 2017

2016 Round Up

To say that 2016 was a rough year is an understatement. There was so much personal loss and medical challenges that I almost wanted to just give up.

The year started off with trips to the beach and job changes for John. We actually went out of town a lot the first 6 months of the year with 4 trips to the beach, 2 trips to the mountains, and several day trip to Atlanta and other surrounding areas. Then came an ill fated trip to the doctor and all the bad test results that resulted in a very quiet last 6 months of the year

In the time surrounding all these test results, we had tickets to see Steve Miller. (Being the good wife I am, I got front row sets for John's birthday.) On our way to the concert came the worst phone call. My mom called and told me my aunt was rushed to the hospital and that she wasn't going to make it. It was awful. We went to the concert and then to the hospital. For the first time in 12 or 13 years, all the cousins were in one place. And while I wish the circumstances were different, we had the gift of 3 days together in a hospital room or waiting room to remember all the good times and to just be together as a family. In the end though we said good bye to one of the strongest women I have ever known and to the one who loved me as her own. It is hard. Watching my uncle now without here is a learning experience of a whole new strength and forging new paths.

The day after the concert, I had a biopsy done. And then the waiting began. Followed by a in office procedure and more waiting. A minor complication put me on bed rest for a couple of days in which time, Josh ruptured BOTH ear drums. Oh yes, both. He couldn't make it easy with just one.

So the week of Thanksgiving, he had surgery to remove his tubes from both ears and to patch the holes. I know that there was a purpose in that but y'all this kid went from being able to hear with no problems to being back in a fish bowl. I really see more tubes going in. We also had to change pediatricians this summer and his ADHD medication was changed. We were trialing him off the medicine just to see what would happen. Two weeks into school he came and asked me to please put him back on the medicine. It made his dyslexia and dysgraphia easier to manage. So a new perscription later and my "C" student went to making all "A"s and loving to read. Now if I could just get the cost off the medicine to come down that would be great.

In all of this, my test results have been looming over our heads until my follow up appointment the week before Christmas. Cue 3 weeks later and the best phone call ever with normal test results. For which we are incredibly grateful and blessed. It is a huge weight lifted. Although with that comes follow up visits every  6 months at least it isn't every 3 months.

We ended the year with a quiet evening at home and 2017 started with tornados and a trip out of town for the adults. We are glad for 2016 to be over and so far 2017 has been full of wonderful blessings. I hope that you have a wonderful 2017 filled with blessings and dreams coming true.

Happy 2017 Everyone!!!!!

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

It's been longer than I planned

when I decided to take a writing break, I didn't think it would be this long. It was a much needed break but I have missed this space. This morning I am sitting in a surgery center with Josh waiting to have his tubes removed and ear drums patched. It's just Josh and me. And as much as I wish John was here and he didn't have to work, I have incredible support. My co-workers have checked on us and they are in the office under us if I need anything. That is incredibly reassuring for me.
This summer has been rough. I lost my aunt who treated me like one of her own and who I love dearly. I really thought I would lose my uncle too. They were just so much a part of each other. But he has surprised us all. I am so grateful for the 4 days we spent at her bedside with all of my cousins and the rest of our family. It's been years since we were all together. Losing her feels like the first of many adult losses. It made me remember that our parents are getting older just like we are. It also made me realize that we are older and we are the age they were when we thought they were really old.
We spent a lot of time as a family these past few months too. John having a job where he is off every weekend has made it so much better. We have gone to the beach, started kayaking, gone to the mountains, and visited Auburn for football games. We have replaced flooring, painted, and started new hobbies. This writing break was busy and beneficial.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I think that's why I felt the need to write again. I have so much to be grateful for. And this blog is one of those things. It has been a space for me to share from but also a place that forgives when breaks turn into such long periods of time. So I think the break is over. I have no plans to return to writing everyday or even every week. But definitely once a month.

So Happy Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all of you.

Saturday, March 19, 2016

Irish Cooking

This review was honestly due a couple of days ago. But a jam packed rough week leads to not writing it until now. I may or may not have mentioned before that I love to cook BUT I hate the clean up after. Which means I really don't cook often. BUT I received this amazing new cookbook from Ambassador International and I can't wait to try some of these recipes.

I don't have another Saturday off for a couple of weeks but the first one I have I am planning on cooking up a storm and doing something I have not done in a long while- cooking breakfast for my family. "Favorite Flavors of Ireland" is filled with great recipes for every season and every meal. One of my favorite so far is Blueberry- White Chocolate Muffins. This recipe combines two favorites at my house. And they are easy to make.

2 cups all purpose flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
3/4 cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs
1 1/2 cups buttermilk
4 tbsp Kerrygold Irish butter (or regular butter)
4 oz white chocolate
1 tsp lemon zest
1 1/2 cups blueberries
12 tsp prepared lemon curd (optional)

1. Preheat the oven to 400 degree F. Grease a standard muffin pan and dust with flour, tap out excess
2. In a large bowl, combine the flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Set aside
3. In a microwave-safe bowl, combine the butter and white chocolate. Microwave on medium-high for 1 minute; stir. Microwave an additional 10-15 second intervals, stirring just until melted. Set aside.
4. In a large bowl, whisk together the eggs and buttermilk. Stir in the flour mixture and then stir in the melted chocolate, lemon zest, and blueberries.
5. Divide the batter into the prepared pan and place a tsp of the lemon curd on top of each one (if using). Bake for 23-25 mins, or until a skewer inserted into the center comes out clean. Remove from the oven and let cool on a wire rack for 10-15 mins.
(Recipe found on page 59)

There are so many recipes in this book that I want to try! Nutty Brown Bread, Beef in Ale with Cheese Cobbler, and Bramley Apple Cake with Toffee Sauce are just a few. Also in the book are stories of Irish traditions and holidays. If you love all things Irish, I would buy this cookbook. If you are just wanting to cook for St. Patrick's Day (next year), I would buy this cookbook. Basically, I would just buy this cookbook as a staple for your kitchen.

**I received this cookbook from the publisher in exchange for my honest review.**

Monday, February 29, 2016

Wandering through the Wilderness and a Curious Faith

Walking in a wilderness is a pretty apt description of the last several months of my life. Decisions made, things revealed, and lots and lots of hurt to sift through. Then one of the women that truly inspires me wrote a book that just hit home."Curious Faith" by Logan Wolfram is releasing March 1st and I have been ready to share it with you since before I read it.  I will confess that I started and stopped this book several times because this book kept hitting a nerve that, honestly, I just didn't want to deal with yet. But I kept going back to the book. At one point, I realized that I was stopping to highlight more than I was reading each time I sat down with it. And when I reached the "wilderness" section of the book, I found myself soaking in every word.

Photo Credit: Christin Slade

I have felt forgotten more in the last 6 months than I have ever before. By friends and family but mostly by God. I have felt like I was lost in a wilderness that no one even cared to look in for me. And while I realize that no one actually forgot me and that God never abandoned me, there were times when it literally felt like I was completely alone. I am a true believer in the saying "God doesn't give you more than you can handle" but sometimes I find myself drowning in what he thinks I can.

Photo credit: Courtney Szollosy

Through every hard minute of the last several months, I have asked myself if any of it was worth it and really where was all of this leading. I am starting to see where that path was leading. And in a hallway of possibilities, I am starting to see open doors where all there were before were closed ones.

"Every decision in my life felt like it was stuck. I was trapped between hope for an indetermined future and the day to day of living in my present brokenness."  

These two sentences from Logan Wolfram perfectly summed up where I have been the last several months. Wandering in a wilderness trying to find my path and reclaim a faith that used to be strong and I thought unbreakable. I lost my curiousness about a major part of my life. This book was basically placed in my hands at just the right moment. And this woman, who I love to see in South Carolina, who has made me cry tears of joy and tears of brokenness, and who has inspired me more than she will ever know- has given me another gift that I will never be able to repay. 

And I really want you to buy this book so that you can see what I'm talking about. I know that I say buy this book it's a great book alot. But I don't want you to buy this book because it's a great book. I want you to buy this book because it is a blessing in disguise. I want you to buy this book because I know that when Logan sat down and wrote it she prayed for everyone who would read her words. And I think that matters. So click on the picture below and be prepared to be curious and to realize you are not forgotten. 


Saturday, February 6, 2016

"Thin Ice"- {a review}

This new novel by Irene Hannon was a great way to start my new year reading! 

Christy watches her sister's house burn with her sister inside shortly after her parents are killed in an accident. Or so she thought. When it seems Ginny may still be alive but held captive by someone, Chrissy turns to Speciel Agent Lance McGregor for help. Together they work through a bigger mystery than either of them bargained for. 

I love Irene Hannon and her writing style! This book kept me captivated throughout and surprised me several times. I highly recommend any book by Hannon but this has been my favorite to date. 

Definitely add this one to your 2016 reading list!